9 previous personals profiles photos updated today. Click here for thumbs!
Photos updated last week - list of profiles
Photos updated last week - links with thumbs (may be huge page to load!)
Currently there are 17431 Russian personals in OUR Dating Album. And 51559 previously listed women are no longer available.
JOKES, vol.1JOKES, vol.2Blondes JOKESMore Blondes JOKESPuzzle Game
Read love articles here:
Doc Love (Recommended!!)The RoMANtic column
BLONDES JOKES, volume 2
Two blondes were driving through Louisiana. As they were
approaching the town of Natchitoches, they started arguing
about the pronunciation of the name. They argued back and
forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the
counter, one blonde asked the manager, "Before we order,
could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please
pronounce where we are,...very slowly?"
The manager leaned over the counter and said,
"Burrrrrrrr-gerrrrrrr-Kiiiiing."
A retired sailor purchased a computer and began to learn all about computing. Being a sailor, he was used to addressing his ships as "She" or "Her". But was unsure what was proper for computers.
To solve his dilemma, he found two groups of computer experts: one group was male, and the other group was female.
The group of women reported that computers should be refereed to as "HE" because:
1. In order to get their attention you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems but half the
time they are the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you
had waited a little longer, you could have had a newer
and better model.
The group of men reported that computers should be referred to as "SHE" because:
1. No one but the creator understands their logic.
2. The native language they use to talk to other computers is
incomprehensible to anyone else.
3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory
for later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find
yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.
A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling
it, because the car had 250,000 miles on it.
One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon. The
brunette told her, "There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell,
but it's not legal."
"That doesn't matter," replied the blonde, "if I only can sell the car."
"Okay," said the brunette. "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns
a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will turn the counter in your
car back to 50,000 miles. Then it should not be a problem to sell your car
anymore."
The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic. About one
month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, "Did you sell your car?"
"No," replied the blonde, "why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it."
Job Application
A blonde goes in to apply for a job and she fills out an application.
She takes it up to the man and he says you forgot three blanks.
He asks how old are you, so she counts on her fingers and finally reaches 22,
okay then how tall are you so she tries to measure herself she says 5'2, okay then what
is your name, she nodes her head back and forth for a few seconds and says Jenifer.
He says okay I get how you got your age and you height, but how you you get your
name by noding your head back and forth, she says I was singing "Happy birthday
to you, Happy birthday to you, Happy Birthday dear jenifer.
The Blonde Farmer
A blonde bought two horses, and could never remember which was which. A neighbor suggested
that she cut the tail of one horse and that worked great until the other horse got his tail
caught in a bush. It tore just right and looked exactly like the other horse's tail and our
friend was stuck again. The neighbor suggested she notch the ear off one horse. That worked
fine until the other horse caught his ear on a barbed wire fence. Once again our friend couldn't
tell them apart. The neighbor suggested she measure the horses for height. When she did, she was
very pleased to find that the white horse was 2 inches taller than the black.
Blonde Swimmer
A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are in a breast stroke race.
The starter's gun goes off and the three girls dive into the pool. The brunette and the redhead shoot across the pool and get out; 20 minutes later the blonde reaches the end and gets out.
The judge says, "The gold medal goes to the brunette, the silver medal goes to the redhead, and the bronze goes to the blonde".
The blonde says, "I don't want to be a sore loser, but I think the other girls were using their arms."
A policeman spots a blonde driving and knitting at the
same time. Driving up beside her, he shouts out the
window, "Pull over!"
"No," she shouts back, "a pair of socks!"
A lawyer and a blonde woman are sitting next to each other
on a long flight from LA to NY. The lawyer leans over to
her and asks if she would like to play a fun game. The
blonde is tired and just wants to take a nap, so she
politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a
few winks. The lawyer persists, saying that the game is
really easy and a lot of fun.
He explains how the game works: "I ask you a question, and
if you don't know the answer, you pay me, and visa-versa."
Again, she politely declines and tries to get some sleep.
The chauvinistic lawyer figures that since his opponent
is a blonde he will easily win the match, so he makes
another offer:
"Okay, how about this "If you don't know the answer you
pay me only $5, but if I don't know the answer, I will pay
you $50."
This catches the blonde's attention and, figuring that
there will be no end to this torment unless she plays,
she agrees to play the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. "What's the distance
from the earth to the moon?"
The blonde doesn't say a word, reaches in to her purse,
pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer.
Now, it's the blonde's turn. She asks the lawyer, "What goes
up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?"
The lawyer looks at her with a puzzled look. He takes out
his laptop computer and searches all his references. He
taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the Net
and even the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends
E-mails to all his co-workers and friends he knows. All to
no avail.
After over an hour, of searching for the answer he finally
gives up. He wakes the blonde and hands her $50.
The blonde politely takes the $50 and turns away to get
back to sleep.
The lawyer, who is more than a little frustrated, wakes the
blonde and asks, "Well, so what IS the answer?"
Again without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse,
hands the lawyer $5, and goes back to sleep.
A blonde is speaking to her psychiatrist.
Blonde: "I'm on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that they
can never reach me."
Psychiatrist: "Don't you have a phone in your car?"
B: "That was a little too expensive, so I did the next best thing. I put
a mailbox in my car.
P: "Uh ... How's that working?"
B. "Actually, I haven't gotten any letters yet."
P. "And why do you think that is?"
B. "I figure its because when I'm driving around, my zip code keeps
changing."
Electronics Store
Ok, there's this blonde who wants to buy a TV, so she goes down to the electronics store and tells the salesman, "Sir, I want to buy this TV." And the salesman goes, "We don't sell to blondes."
So she goes home and dies her hair brown. The next day she comes back, and says to the salesman. "Sir, I want to buy this TV." The salesman says, "I'm sorry, we don't sell to blondes."
So she goes back home and shaves off her hair and puts on a baseball cap. Later that day she goes back to the electronics store. Once more she says, "Sir, I am going to buy this TV." This time the salesman says, "Look ma'm, I told you, we can't sell to blondes!" The blonde says, "Gosh, I dyed my hair then shaved it! How do you know I am a blonde?"
The salesman: "This is a microwave."
JOKES, vol.1JOKES, vol.2Blondes JOKESMore Blondes JOKESPuzzle Game
Read love articles here:
Doc Love (Recommended!!)The RoMANtic column
